Andreas - it has been so, so hard without you here with me. Megan and Jack have been amazing and continue to make us proud. They miss you loads. Tonight is tough, but I want to be strong. I miss you so very, very much. I hardly dare to think about you because I'm only just hanging on. Give me a sign that you are near - please! A new year without you - so difficult but I will try to make you proud. All my love, every minute of every day. Mags xxxx